i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Randomize
