So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Randomize
