So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
