I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Randomize
