hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Vodka?
Forever.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
