There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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