I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Randomize
