and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
