he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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