I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
