Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize