Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
