Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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