I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
