that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
