nut hugger
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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