I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
