So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
