I showed him my bush... on skype.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
