the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
it's like iHOP with fire
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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