No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
