can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
she pinky promised me she was 18
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
