I'm lost and stupid without you.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
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