Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
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