whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
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