So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Randomize