I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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