I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
