How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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