some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
