She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
porn star boner night. come get it.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Randomize
