Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
