so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
