he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
