You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
We talked him into tasing himself.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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