Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
