you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize