At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize