D3 body, D1 cock
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
