How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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