You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Randomize
