direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
