bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
