Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Randomize
