i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
40s are totally the cure
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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