My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
there is glitter all over my balls
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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