it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
