all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
