Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
