Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize