He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
